Wednesday, April 18, 2012

CRAFT moments

Don't you love that expression 'a woman of a certain age'? I always used to wonder how old that was exactly. I mean a 'certain age' sounds rather romantic in a way, doesn't it? Try saying it with a French accent and it sounds even better  'C'est une dame d'un certain âge, mais oui'  (is that right? I can never remember the masculine feminine things in French).

Anyway, where was I? Oh yes, wondering what it was exactly to be a certain age.

Well now, I know. I am that thing. In fact it's quite definite now. I am a woman of a certain age.

Still, I expect you want to know how I have come to know this?

Actually, it was all the subtle (or not so subtle) hints to begin with. Things young people would say like "there were a lot of people your age there", and then proceed to tell me about the number of zimmer frames they saw in the entrance hall to the event in question.

Then it was my students saying things like "Oh our stats professor's really old. He must be in his fifties now, you know, like you?"

They never noticed my pained look.

Then finally, the references became more direct. I think it was either one of my daughters or their partners who said recently, "when women like you get to a certain age, they........". I remember the expression freezing on my face. I never even heard the rest of what it was they were going to tell me. It was the dreaded words 'a certain age' that did it. That was when I realised I was there and I had to face the fact.

To young people, being a certain age means  that you are old; to slightly older people, it mean that you are older than them; and to tactful people of your own age, it means you are old like them but they don't want to mention it. Simple, but a tad humbling when you realise that you are, in fact, the last person to have realised it.

Still, it has certain advantages and one of these is having legitimate CRAFT moments. I may have mentioned these before, but being of a certain age, I have now conveniently forgotten this, because in fact I have a lot of CRAFT moments as a result. In case you too have forgotten, or maybe because I have never actually mentioned it at all (not being able to recall these things), a CRAFT moment is an acronym for 'can't remember a flipping thing'.

I have them with increasing frequency (if that's possible and not tautology). CRAFT can happen within the space of seconds. Someone will tell me something in conversation and within moments I am earnestly asking them a question about what they have just told me. When they look at me oddly, I usually remember what I have just forgotten and put it airily down to CRAFT. When they look at me even more oddly, I mutter something about pottery to cover up the moment. Pottery, potty, nuts. You can almost see the word association flitting across their faces, so then I just tell them with as much disarming candour as I can muster:

"Yes, my dear, I am a woman of a certain age and I can't remember an effing..oops, I mean flipping... thing. You'll be there one of these days, and then you'll understand the real meaning of the word CRAFT."

You'd be surprised (or maybe not) at how quickly they change the subject. I mean, it's one thing to label a woman as being of 'a certain age', but it's quite another when they have to accept the CRAFT that goes with it. But I have, and you know something? I don't mind. I am, (how you say), a certain age indeed.

And this photo has nothing to do with anything and I can't remember why I took it, but I like it anyway. I kind of feel it's me in it's chaotic informality, being a crafter and that  :)


  1. I remember when being young and in training, that every respected expert or specialist was described to me as: having forgotten more than you will ever know.

    So Val enjoy the eccentricities of your age and the acclaim for you that tumbles from others lips :)

  2. I think I'm becoming crafty before my time. :)

    What a hilarious post, Val. We call them senior moments here. :)

  3. I much prefer the statement in french.!!

  4. Ha ha, Grace, everything sounds so much better in French. :)

  5. Oh, this post hits home! How many times do I get to the top of the stairs and think "why did I come up here?". I have also started admitting to being a bit batty! Now what were we talking about........

  6. At my "certain age" I'm very crafty indeed :)
    My ability to craft is very irritating to the people surrounding me. It has got to the point that I in the middle of a sentence forget what I was talking about and what I should say next...
    And I have for sure forgotten more than my younger workmates will ever know and that irritates them to the max because they are thinking inbetween themselves that they know a lot. And yes, my title includes the word "specialist"... :)

  7. Oh I'm so glad I'm not the only one :)) I have so enjoyed reading all these comments, especially the fact that Mel and Hans, my two gentlemen contributors both refer to the same comment about being a 'mature' specialist! Lovely!

    Anne Marie, I also think it is the product of a busy mind and a certain amount of ADD on my part, so if you are being crafty before your time, I'm sure the first of these applies to you too.

    Grace, as AM says, everything sounds better in French!

    Fran, isn't that anoying? I also do it all the time, but then see my response to Anne Marie. I think the 'busy mind' syndrome also applies to you too because you and seh are much to young to be of a certain age!

    Hans ...and Mel...ditto. I hope it's true, though :))

  8. From what I understand this COULD be hormonal...take choline!

  9. Thank you very much, String. You are always such a fund of knowledge. I'll definitely try it.Val xx

  10. The thing about ADD is that it is supposed to lessen as you get older, and I find mine has become increasingly worse (or better, depending on your interpretation!)

    I am busy, ADD, and closing in on 50 this year. A dreadful combo for remembering anything. :)

  11. Anne Marie, my sister always tells me I'm too easily distracted. If that's ADD, then I am a bit of that too, so you and me, dear, we don't stand a chance..hehe. Val
    ps. I'm not signing in because this is a hostel computer and I don't want to have my presence left on it too much...

  12. Your sister is a better diplomat than mine- she calls me the human sieve.

  13. Anne Marie, your sister is great! I love it :)) oh and I nearly wrote!

  14. Can you let us know, if you remember to, whether choline helps. xx

  15. Anne..haha...I've already forgotten...what was that? Seriously, though, when I have a chance to go and look for Choline and then remember to take it, I will most definitely make that one of the tests - remembering to tell you, that

  16. Haha!
    I can totally relate!
    As a member of the "persons of a certain age" club, I have become quite dotty.
    I've also discovered that, in the throes of the big M, if I'm not sweating, I'm crying.
    No wonder we dry out.

  17. LOL, Dale. Dare I say it? Been there, done and been through all that, and yes, the drying out is depressing...and that's not from alcohol consumption either :)

  18. Thank you very much, String. You are always such a fund of knowledge. I'll definitely try it.Val xx


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